Couples who are having trouble balancing their checkbooks and stopping fights about money problems can get help through financial therapy.
In fact, one survey found that money problems were the main source of stress in relationships.
The reasons for this stress vary from person to person and couple to couple, but the effects on a marriage or relationship are often the same: long fights about how to handle money and worry about whether the couple will be ready for their financial future.
Smart couples know they should get help, but what kind of expert is best? A traditional financial advisor probably won’t be able to help with your marriage problems, and a marriage counselor probably won’t be able to help you make a financial plan. The middle ground you’re looking for might be financial therapy, which combines parts of treatment from the fields of mental health and financial planning.
What does financial therapy for couples mean?
A financial counselor might say, “Oh, I’ll set up a plan for making payments or investing.” But the client isn’t telling them that this is just a sign of a much bigger problem, and most financial counselors aren’t trained to figure that out.
In fact, financial experts say that they spend a lot of their time dealing with problems that have nothing to do with money, such as trouble in a marriage. On the other hand, many couples who go to marriage counseling talk about financial stress or problems.
Financial therapy for couples is easiest to understand if you think of it as a practice that helps you change the way you handle your money. But it can also give people a chance to talk about other things that cause problems. When money problems come up in a marriage or partnership, they are often just the start of something bigger.
Marriage financial counseling is meant to help people learn how to talk to each other in a way that helps them talk about their worries, goals, and concerns about money. Instead of letting emotions get in the way and take over conversations about money, financial marriage counseling can teach partners how to solve problems and talk to each other better. This can help improve their relationship.
Financial therapy, financial advisory, or financial coaching?
Before you hire a money counselor, financial counselor, or financial therapist to help you and your partner with your money problems or goals, it can be helpful to know what each professional specializes in.
Should you hire a therapist, advisor, or coach for your money? Let’s look at what makes them different:
Financial therapy
A financial therapist helps couples figure out how to talk to each other about money. Since debt, overspending, and money problems can be stressful for couples, a family financial counselor or financial therapist can help them learn how to talk about their problems (like compulsive spending), listen to each other, make a financial plan, and have productive conversations (not just fights).
Financial advisory
The goal of financial advising is for a professional to help clients in all kinds of situations, like making investments, getting insurance, and planning for retirement. Financial advisors can help anyone who wants to learn how to make the best decisions about investments, debt, and personal finances. They are not just for people who have trouble managing their money.
Financial coaching
The goal of a financial coach is to help clients figure out what their financial strengths and weaknesses are. So, each client can figure out how they want to change, how they can reach their long-term goals, and how they can talk to their partner about these needs to start working together.
How does financial therapy for couples work?
If you are thinking about going to couple’s financial counseling or financial therapy, it is helpful to know how the process works before you start. Couples will go to therapy sessions together to learn how to talk to each other about money, change how they think about money, and start using new, healthy money habits and strategies.
In short, financial counseling for couples works by combining financial coaching with emotional coaching to improve the relationship between partners and help them make better financial decisions. By bringing in a professional, you can find out what’s behind the money fights, communication problems, and misunderstandings that can lead to bad feelings.
When do you need financial therapy?
There are some signs that you and your partner might need help with your finances. If you notice any of these things, it might be time to talk to a professional for help, like a financial therapist or a financial therapy association.
Facing mental health problems
One of the first signs that you need to look for a “financial therapist near me” is a sharp drop in mental health and a change in how you feel about money. Debt and money problems can cause stress, fighting, and negativity, so it’s not unusual to have bad mental health and money problems at the same time, but paying down your debt can make you happier and improve your relationships overall.
Having issues with your partner
You may also need a financial therapist if your relationship with your partner is rocky or bad. If you are fighting, getting angry, feeling sad, and not talking to each other, this could mean that money problems are taking over your relationship.
There’s no way to deal with it
If the stresses of everyday life are getting in the way of your happiness and you can’t shake the feeling of dread or anxiety, this could mean that financial therapy could help. By going to therapy, you can learn the right ways to deal with difficult situations and calm down a negative mindset.
Lack of motivation and drive
Do you have trouble getting yourself to do the things you need to do every day? The last sign that you might need to see a money therapist is a lack of motivation or productivity during the day. If you used to look forward to going to work or spending time with your partner, but now you don’t, it could be a sign that money problems are taking over your life.
Financial abuse
If your partner has a lot of control over your money in a way that hurts you a lot, this could be financial abuse. You might want to talk to a financial counselor, but there are also other things to think about.
